Really. Its been nearly two weeks since i came in to this physical and mental prison. Since then, the only feeling i have felt is wither extreme pain or numbness. Well, there are no extreme numbness as numbness is.. Well, numb.
It all started with five tubes, then down to four(not a very pleasant eperience getting there), then down to one. Currently, there are no tubes, unless you count the "head"(or watever it was called... Butterfly needle i think it was called) stuck in my left hand. It took those pea brains seven tries to get a friggin needle in my veins. Stupid houseman. A more senior doctor came in scowling n had it done with one try. Wait, he wasnt even trying, he just put it in n shrugged off.
The first few days are the worst and one of the best. Bsc the anaestetic was still in effect so u wont feel much. After the second day, all hell breaks lose. U regain some sense only to have them choke with pain. Every organ which have pain receptors on it is hysterical with pain. Tats the best description i can provide. I can only sleep in the afternoon and evening bsc the noise around drowns out some of the pain. At night, i feel very tired and my eye lids are as heavy as lead but i cant shun the pain away. To make things worse, those bitch of a nurses slept on duty so i cant gt help as i cant speak.
The firstweek is hell. Usually, the pain die down abit through the night, only to have them renewed in the morning as they started pulling out tubes almost every morning. Pulling the tubes out really hurt. The first tube hurt the most bsc of the location. The second and third bsc it was inside my gums when it was removed. The rest is less painful. Maybe its bsc i hv lost my sense of pain by then that pain doesnt register anymore.
The subsequent days are more peaceful since there are no more tubes to pull n no more wires to tighten. I fill my days by reading. A LOT of reading. Newspapers, books, magazine you name it. Even advertisements and fire extinguisher instructions lol.. Yes, i was that bored. Armed with nothing but a cellphone, i hv sucessfuly bugged a few person in my phonebook out of boredom. HAHAHAHAHAH... And i only get to online when mom came over with her ipad or iphone which i take full use of the dataplan. But the online world seemed to b less interesting since then.. Think its bsc im not at my own pc where i am more familliar with microsoft or linux based OSes.. Oh btw, i HATE iOS... I just hate them for being so... Annoying. I am NOT going to buy any of apple's product in the near or far future.
To be honest, i missed the outside world. I missed... People, person. i missed the food, i missed the feel of good company, i missed cycling around the taman with my sis or just the tickle fight... Bah, i just want to get out. I want to get out, to own those petty noobs in ava. I wanna go experiment with linux as i have previously devoted my late nights doing. I want to studyalong with my frens back at inti. I want to video call the person i could not let go of. There is just SO much things i wanted to do back in the outside world. I want to drive, i want to go meet people i hv not met for months, i want to go to bed bsc i am physically tired instead of bsc its late, i want.... To just get out of here.
Tmr would mark the end of the second week i am caged in ts place. I hv been following rules and directions by the letter for hope of faster recovery. I avoided things that i could do but the doctor didnt recommend. Mom didnt agree to this as she kept wanting to do MORE and challenge the doctor's recommendation. Always with all her suppliments and fancy stuff. She would hv brought a juice maker here if i didnt stop her. Today she bought some i dont know wat the heck supplements and orders me to take them. Says will heal better la, no worries la, surely no problems with doctors la(she did NOT consulted ANY doctor) and all her stupid excuse. I object, she gets mad. She just doesnt or incapable of understanding that if any of those clashed with current medication or what what, I AM SCREWED!!! And the last thing i want is to get hospitalized a second longer or bed ridden or worse, DEAD. Always with extra stuff to make others life worse. And im not the only one who knew this, dad was furious on multiple occasions bsc of mom likes to hiao.
I dont know what to think. Its just, i really really really wanna get outta here. To those who are willing to spend the time, money and effort to visit, i am very grateful to yall. U guys make my stay just that much better.
Haiz.. I am grumbling and ranting. Well, life is never fair, why try eh? No worries, i'll do fine. Off to read Brisingr, my all time favorite.. Cheerio!
